Every Monday, I post and answer a selection from my collection of good questions. This week’s question is “What didn’t last forever but was still worth your while?”
College Friendships Didn’t Last Like I Expected
In my experience, most friendships are seasonal and do not last forever. This perspective never seems truer than in college. As students, we arrived eager to do something that mattered to us, to be who we thought we were, to belong to a community. From the beginning, we planned to be in college for a short time – a year, four years, six years. Most of us made friends despite the “expiration date” of graduation day. We made friends with people knowing not all of the relationships would last (or promising each other that we would be the exception). In the end, life and distance and a whole host of post-college experiences filled our time and most of those college relationships changed or faded away altogether.
Although I still chat on the phone or schedule in-person visits when I’m in the right area, most of those college friendships have faded into distant memories or maybe into keeping up whenever we appear in each other’s Facebook newsfeeds. I used to feel badly about not maintaining the relationships to the extent I had intended but now my philosophy is that it is natural for friendships to change.
We will never again be teenagers or twenty-somethings living in college dorms and apartments together, complaining about cafeteria food and joking about professors and asking each other hard questions. Nevertheless I value those inside jokes, hard questions and stories we lived together. I enjoyed my college years in a large part because of the friends I made during that season where our lives intersected in time and space.
If you are one of my college friends, I still remember you and tell stories about fun times and life lessons from our season together. College friends, getting to know you was undoubtedly worthwhile.
Now It’s Your Turn to Ask & Answer
Take the questions and ask your friends or family. I would love to hear your answers in the comments (seriously. that’s why I ask, after all)! If you have suggestions of questions for me to include, let me know.
At the high school where I work, this is spirit week in preparation for our homecoming basketball game on Friday. Monday was Mismatched Crazy Hair Day, so I wore my hair like this.
For reference, it usually looks like this.
I received a variety of responses and determined that today’s hairstyle was not crazy in many other people’s perspectives.
Male teacher: Oh, you got a haircut.
Female teacher: Hey, I like your hair! You should wear it that way more often.
Male student: Nice hair, Mrs. Howe!
Female student 1: What is up with your hair?
Me: It’s for crazy hair day.
Female student 2 (to her classmate): You shouldn’t say that. What if she was actually trying to look nice?
My favorite anecdote from today:
In one class, a female student mocked my hair derisively in Spanish to the girl across from her while I was standing in plain view near their table. After a minute, I continued circulating around the room to help students and overheard the other girl inform the mocker that I actually speak and understand Spanish. The first girl was shocked and grew a little quieter after that. I simply smiled and continued helping students with their assignments.
Filed under photos, stories
1. Tuesday night at class, I spent the first hour doing the administrative work of testing instead of the teaching work I love. I was grateful to have my assisting teacher there and she cheerfully went through the planned activity with the class until I could get there. I did enjoy getting to teach and interact with students during the second half of the class, though.
2. I keep growing frustrated – mostly at myself – for being unable to do everything on my to-do list. Between my own expectations and those of others, my to-do list grows long in a hurry and I am still unskilled at delegating and telling people “no.” I keep forgetting that God gives me enough time to accomplish everything He wants me to do but not necessarily to do everything I think I must do.
1. Friday night at class, I taught a lesson based on drawing your own family tree and got all but one of my fifteen students chattering enthusiastically and practicing their English!
2. On a shopping trip in a nearby city with my parents, we accomplished all our errands and went to Panda Express and Starbucks! Oh, and my dad decided to join Twitter while we were on that shopping trip. So far he doesn’t tweet but treats it more like a personalized news feed.
What were your lows and highs from the past week?
Lows & Highs is a Stories from the Stairs weekly feature. Feel free to join in by posting your lows and highs in the comments or by posting a link to your lows and highs blog post.
Filed under life, stories
What’s a common misconception people have about you?
Many people think I am an extrovert, but I consider myself an outgoing introvert. I like to think before I talk and find spending time with people to be emotionally and physically draining, no matter how fun or fascinating they are. Thanks to two very outgoing parents, I learned to be outgoing at the right time and place. I enjoy spending time with people I love and meeting new ones, but there comes a point where I’m ready to go home or slip away for time to be alone.